Yesterday offered up a bit of a challenge for us. Natalie can't go back to daycare until next week, since she had RSV, so we have had to maneuver our schedules around each other so that one of us has her at all times. Normally he has Tuesdays off, but because of some schedule changes last week, he had to cover a shift this week. I have class Tuesday afternoons. So, Natalie had her first college experience. She seemed enthralled by the teacher! She was polite, listened intently and, I swear, if she could have taken notes, she would have! Luckily for us, the class only consists of two students, a professor and occasionally a guest speaker (the professor's son.)
By the end of class, Natalie was tired and refusing to eat. We headed home and I snapped the carseat into the stroller for storage inside, like I usually do (to keep the cat out...) and went to use the restroom before taking care of the slightly upset doll in front of me. When I returned, she was making fussy sounds that were new to me... She took a deep breath, hummed/whined and blew raspberries with her lips, drool flowing gently onto her already disgusting bib. She looked at me with teary eyes. I laughed at her.
The sounds were almost like she was pretending to cry to see what result she would get. I didn't think she was that old yet! I knew she was hungry, wet and tired, so I prepared the bottle and returned with the video camera! I wonder, does that make me a bad mommy? I don't think so, she only fussed for a few minutes, but it was the most precious thing I've seen in a while! I talked to her so she didn't think I was ignoring her except for this weird buzzing machine in her face. I told her she was a pretty girl... and she smiled! Now I was certain she was manipulating me! I put the camera away and went to settle in on the couch with her and her newly changed bottom and fresh, warm bottle.
We had a cozy evening, though I was starving by this point. I realized again how scared I really am to love her, though. Especially since I have no control over it! I love her more than life itself and would do anything for her... including laughing while she cries!